Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Can i not drive my cunt home
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize