it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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