Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Let's paint friendship bongs
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I think my moral compass just broke
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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