tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize