i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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