I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
