The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
