Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
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