you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
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just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
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