come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
