Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE