mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
