I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
