I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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