Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.