no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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