.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The best revenge is premature balding
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I can't put those talents on a resume
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize