Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize