just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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