And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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