If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
