I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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