I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize