I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
