haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
