This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
