Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize