Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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