Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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