I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize