Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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