But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
im drinking this country out of the recession.
he puts the penis in happiness.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
