I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
