butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize