Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
