Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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