what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
even my farts smell like vagina
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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