it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son