i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
