Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
