he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
