So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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