i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
