my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
