Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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