next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
