White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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