he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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