Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Randomize
