Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You need a sexual gate keeper
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
