check it out our google latitudes are spooning
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
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